Impatient,
I want to talk to you but can’t.
THAT is what prompted me
To stop and talk to you honestly.
I enjoy talking to you,
Get to work everyday and look
Forward to your first smile, your
First word. I could have let things go
On but what would that have solved?
I am one to face pain
Head on, always have, always will.

My bright chipper self
Is partially due
To my adoration of you.
If I stop caring
For you I will retreat
Into myself again, and
I care so beautifully.

Do you come to work,
Looking forward to my
First smile, my first word,
My excitement at seeing you.
Do you go home each day
Looking forward or in dread.

All this I realize is about me.
My need for you proves I cannot
Live alone quietly. It is about
You, are you happy in your
Entirety.

I quest, thirst for understanding,
My passion driving intently forward.

I lied, I have not been through worse.
To identify the object of desire,
Knowing it could be sweet..
Just in the distance out of reach,
It is agony and enough to say
No longer do I have faith in god.