I awoke this morning in despondence of a dream where I am standing in the stingy rain, feeling too wet. While the heat rises off the pavement, burning my cheeks, burning my heart that beats too fast, I cannot catch my breath. Questions arise in the shadows. Is there something in my heart that I deny? Or am I trying to force meaning and rationalization where they do not belong? And I fear the answer to the former is yes. And I awake in a sweat, soaking wet.

The deep red crush fades into a blue day, and I am confused by thought, by action, and my brave new day that went awry. And the tenderness that scares me as much as words.

When all the world's asleep, I stop to think. In this moment, here and now, I am crawling out of the deep red crush of my heart and heading out into a brave new day.