June poems for robert...

I
When you left,
you left a hole
I anticipated your return
I would lie awake nights
as the air turned cool
And the trees shed their tender skin
I wept most days
but still no you
I gave you my beach
in your dying days
And I think of you there,
Toes sucking sand
cool breezes drifting out to aquamarine horizons
Surrounded by golden boys
Laughing and playing
eyes bright and smiling at me
As I embrace myself
and try to breed
As I grasp life with no intention but to live and know

II
You will never again know the touch of soft, tender, silent lips treading silent kisses across your arm, or the look of need, whispering softly, indiscernible over inebriate desire. You took desire in life. I can only hope you find peace in death.

II
Thanos courted me as a child
But I was not afraid, and will never deny what was
I can only hope you lie in his gentle embrace,
Loved as I was, purely for my soul


Undated June poems...

I
I step outside myself and into the bright sunlight.
Breathing deep the smell of you,
Savoring the touch, the taste,
I pause to wonder just how long we could have made June last.

II
I love
My southern summers with their heat
And the sound of cicada waxing, waning.
I love
Those lazy, languid days when desire throbs
Unrequited and the coolness of your skin burns.
I love
The soft flesh of your lips pressed against me
And the flush that creeps steadily, intensely, deeper.
I love
Unknowingly as my heart aches in silent splinters, unspoken,
Unacknowledged, held at arms length, forced into the depths of
Never-Never, gone the way of fairy kings, softly into that good night.

III
“And he toucheth hir wombe ful softe”
Januarie to May, Chaucer's Merchant's Tale