summer

it’s hot; too hot and yet 

the cold of winter crept

into my bones and settled 

muscles bones sinew tight;

the older I get 

the more I have to move 

the less I want to

why are my legs so cold

when the heat suffocates?

my own thinks

left to myself I

worked too fast

connecting dots completing puzzles 

logic patterns and finding 

things out of place 

but thought - think - too slow

when expressing verbally 

I need time to pull

the right words in the right order 

from the spatial cacophony hovering 

my own thinks just out of reach

impermanence

I have no spouse no

children few 

friends limited

family; 

slowly I erase public 

traces of existence

even now She sleeps

She ran wild in

open spaces dangerous

curious kenneled

in the cool of night and

heat of day physically 

spent, did she find a

moment of rest?

unkenneled, She ran in

recognition of face and

voice urgent, needful 

Birdie! BIRDIE!!

then roamed again

as if she had not seen 

enough everything and

knew what my presence meant

once home She slept

pressed firm against 

my side moving

room to room 

eyes on me always

all night She slept 

our morning walk slow

with glances occasional

you can’t take it with you

Travel and time changes left me with no sleep and a body that moved with little to no conscious effort. It knew the list of things my mind had laid out. 

Waiting in line for a train ticket home, I tried to function appropriately. Peripherally, I saw a slight man hobble, one person to the next, speaking low, one hand grasping the support he needed to walk and the other motioning to his mouth, a universal language for eat, food, hungry.

Without thought I mimicked others with a shake of my head.

“Não Portuguese…” I stumbled to say, brain processing slow. 

He moved on as my mind processed my actions and my hand dug into a small pocket past a single paper and into the coolness of metal. 

I motioned him back. Holding his outstretched palm, I deposited the five or eight euros. 

What was that amount to me?  My next week’s groceries is his meal today. 

mouse along the wall

my superpower is invisibility 

in any proximity in any

conversation group or even 

one-on-one; I say a thing any

thing and I am wrong even 

when I am right and when 

discovered I am right, the thing

I said  becomes that other!s 

thought idea solution

they move forward while 

I watch, a mouse along the wall 

“I am Superman and I can do anything…” ~ I am Superman, The Clique