I thought I had settled in
was settling - in the process of
rooting - envisioning
implementing the vision
of the life I would lead
after a life too determined
a segue in the midst of the trying
of the boggling
down in the mire of figuring
and establishing - hit in a frenzy
has anyone seen my Ikigai?
I sat it just there
on the windowsill to sun
to catch the breeze
I had my eye on it
until the Murphy spilt
into cracks and crevices seeping
has anyone seen my lemon?
I was promised lemons
in a dark room, still
too early for the sun
pushing out a fever
in a clammy-hot sweat
am I in it or past
I knew it was coming
no chills yet
just the sludgy-haze
of breathing shallow
clear but deeply crackling
craving Avgolemono
setting my headspace to right
ready to rule as-is always
what got me through
worser things than this
things near broke me
things that did determined
this will not - up n’ at ‘em
Little Caprica - get ‘er done
I’m exhausted tomorrow
have I mentioned that before?
if I haven’t, certainly
I’ve thought it too many times
suddenly I’m craving sugar
but I’m inherently salty
stuck solid, fim-aly
in the middle of X;
holding It together
with duc-ky tape
and minty glue
rubbing spit
on scrapes and scratches;
holding the leash tight
on the berserker within
purposefully emphatic
kindness won’t kill me yet